How NOT to Deal With Stress

Stress is something that everyone experiences and we all have our own ways of dealing with it. Some can be more effective than others so here we’ll explore some of the less helpful coping skills that people employ to try and cope with their stress:

Blaming

This is a common one and easy to fall into. When life throws us a curve ball it’s often easier to say “if only this person hadn’t done this” or “if only I had that” or some variation. This can feel like we’re venting our frustrations but often has the negative side effect of making us feel powerless in our own lives.

Pushing the Problem Away/Avoiding Problems

This is another common one and can sound surprising. Getting rid of and avoiding problems might seem like the goal of stress management but it is usually counterproductive. When we push a problem away or avoid it we don’t develop coping skills for dealing with it and make it seem bigger than it is. In some cases the problem itself even worsens the longer we put it off.

Substances

This one may seem obvious to some but is worth pointing out. It’s not uncommon to hear “I had a rough day but nothing a bottle of wine can’t fix.” Or “What a day, I need a drink!” While these may sound harmless enough they are similar to avoiding and pushing away the problems. Substances even push away thoughts and emotions which can sometimes lead to situations where we start to lose skills to deal with difficult situations, thoughts, and emotions if we don’t have that go to substance.

Everything mentioned above can have a time and place and be used productively (with reframing and mindfulness). However, if these seem similar to your general skills for coping with stress than it may be helpful to develop new skills like meditation, connection with nature, reading, or anything else that feels helpful for you. If you are struggling with finding healthy coping skills and want help you can contact us at burnoutpreventiontherapy.com to set an appointment.